Something Uncomfortable: Day 53

http://www.facebook.com/SomethingUncomfortableSteppingFromFearToFreedom

I spent most of my youth and early adulthood lying. I did it to stay out of trouble or spare someone's feelings. And let's be honest, lying is socially acceptable in our society. I learned the hard way that lying brings nothing but trouble. Living in truth can be difficult at times, but is so much easier than the alternative.

Before my husband and I had children, we decided that one of our core family values would be: not lying... about anything. This does not mean that our children are entitled to full disclosure about everything because some things are not age appropriate. Rather, we vowed to be honest with them even if it means admitting to them that we are wrong.

This means that we do not believe in the Easter Bunny or Santa (we talk about the real St. Nicholas and the amazing things he did) or the Tooth Fairy. I don't judge people who celebrate these "people" because I totally understand how much fun they are. But personally, we just can't justify lying to our children for the sake of having fun. I have a hard time expecting them to always tell the truth, if I don't tell them the truth. 

With this stance comes A LOT of social drama. In general, people would rather you thump the Bible over their heads instead of you saying the Tooth Fairy is just pretend. We are extremely careful to avoid these conversations around other children, because we do not want to create any problems for them or their families. 

When my son lost his first tooth last night, we were ecstatic. We took pictures, called people and put that precious tooth under his pillow. Why? Because in the middle of the night Mommy and Daddy were going to take his tooth and leave him a prize. He was thrilled!

In the middle of the night, my son ran into our room, thanked us for the $5 and said he wanted to bring his tooth to school today. And so it began. Everything in me wanted to tell him to keep it a secret (we don't like those either). If he didn't tell anyone, then we could avoid the Tooth Fairy conversation. I also thought about coaching him through some mock conversations. Instead, I told him he could take it and silently started to pray. 

I'm proud to say that when asked if the Tooth Fairy came last night, my son simply said, "No, my mom and dad snuck in my room and left me $5." No big deal. 

The thought that keeps going through my mind today is this: If we want them to stand up for what they believe in when they are bigger and peer pressure is greater, we have to teach them to stand up for what they believe in now.

This morning, we left for school singing, "My God is so BIG, so STRONG and so MIGHTY! There's nothing my God cannot do!" He can even give a Mommy the strength and courage to send her baby off to stand up for what he believes in...or doesn't believe in.

What are the core values you have a hard time standing up for?