Something Uncomfortable: Day 43

http://www.facebook.com/SomethingUncomfortableSteppingFromFearToFreedom

Guess what I did today... or rather, guess what I did NOT do today. I haven't weighed myself all day! I can't believe that I can honestly say that.

I made the decision last night to make today the big day. I was completely nervous about it and didn't trust myself not to give in. So I sabotaged the ritual by grabbing a glass of water right after I brushed my teeth. I'm sure all of the girls out there will agree that the best time to weigh yourself is first thing in the morning, after you've gone to the bathroom, while completely naked. (What? Tell me I'm wrong.) By drinking water, I knew whatever numbers I got would be completely inaccurate and not worth going back on my goal.

I'm not going to lie to you. I've been thinking about weighing myself several times today. But the thought that keeps coming louder and stronger is this: Today I chose not to start my day in bondage. Today I chose to be free from the start. 

This has not just been about my OCD and anxieties. This has been about me being in bondage. And when we live in bondage, we can't fully experience our freedom in Christ. And when we don't fully experience our freedom in Christ, we allow satan to stop us from being Christ's light into the world. 

Will I weigh myself tomorrow? Honestly, I don't know. If it doesn't feel like a trap... perhaps. But the one thing I know for certain is that I will never be able to step on a scale again without asking first myself if I am doing it as satan's puppet or as God's child.

**Just a note: I purposely do not capitalize satan's name... EVER. I don't think he deserves the respect that it signifies.